Update on Things Here

I know some of you are wondering how things are going and where are we with everything.  So, I'll take a moment to update you on things.

The paperwork for my divorce was filed in March.  In fact, the day I knew it would be filed was the day I started my 40 day fast.  I could NOT not fast during this.

Presently, my and D.'s lawyers are working out all the technicalities of everything (I think).  Final papers are supposed to be signed next month - sometimes around the middle of the month.

 God has kept His hand on me in all this. He has given me wisdom, sent me friends to help me, and surrounded me with people to encourage me and support me in this journey.

Prophetic words have been given (all lining up with one another), and even two dreams were given to me, and interpreted by someone within a week of the dreams given.  That in itself was an amazing experience that I'll write about later.

I know this divorce will go through, but then I knew it would go through back in January - God had told me it would go through.  I fought it then in my spirit, and my heart cried out against it.  But, now I am at peace with it.

I know some might not understand, but I'm truly at such a peace in this.  I am content to rest in Him, and I do not cry out against this divorce anymore.  I am just surrendered to whatever God wants to do. I live for Him.

I don't live my life for anyone but Him.  Before, I lived with the fear of what others would think. I lived with the fear of what some would say about me being a divorced woman in the ministry.  I lived with the fear that others DID judge me and said I had given up on my marriage.  But, I know that is not true. I did not give up.  I DID let go when God asked me to do so though.

Should D. get his life together, and come back to God, I would work to reconcile. But, I will not pray for reconciliation or even desire it right now.  I do not.

I wish my picture could turn out differently as some have.  Yet, at the same time, I like the picture that God has set before me of what's ahead.  It is good.  He has good in store.  He has assured me that He will take care of me and the boys no matter the poor decisions of others.  And, He has shown me time and time and time and time again that HE is my provider, and that HE gives favor along with grace for the journey.

My mother and I were talking about this just recently. She said something I hadn't thought about.  She said something along the lines of, "Isn't it interesting that it wasn't God's perfect plan for King David to have all his wives, and it wasn't God's perfect plan for King Solomon to have all his wives.  Yet, David was a man after God's own heart.  AND, God used King David and King Solomon in such a mighty way - to WRITE the Psalms and Song of Solomon and even possibly Ecclesiastes."

Two of my heart cries since I was a LITTLE girls was "Oh God, may I be a girl/woman after your own heart, and God make me wise like Solomon - as wise as him, if you so please to do that."

And, most of my life, I've been told by others, "You have such a passion for God.  God has such an anointing on you.  You have such a heart for God.  The wisdom He has given you is way beyond your years."

Now, I don't ride on the talk of others, but I do KNOW that I strive to do God's will EVERY day of my life. I seek to KNOW Him more and do what HE would have me do.  AND, I pray for wisdom, which I KNOW He gives!  His very Word says He gives it to those who ask.

I know I have found favor with Him, and that I am pleasing in His sight. I know this wasn't His perfect plan - this divorce that I'm about to finish up.  But, it IS in His plan.  And, He will use it for His glory.

So, while I'm waiting.... Well, listen to the song below - It speaks what my heart beats now!



That's about it for now. There is more to write, and I WILL get to it.  But, I have written all I'm supposed to tell for now.  You'll just have to wait for the rest of the story to come later.

Be blessed,

TJ