My news

Well, I guess it's time to tell you.  I haven't posted it here, for my own privacy reasons, but I thought it was about time I posted it here.  About time to tell you what all has been going on in my life in the last few months.

I don't know any other way to break it to you, other than just to come right out and say it.  So here goes.

I AM seeing someone.  Courting, actually.  But, I am seeing someone.

I will tell you more about it all later on, but I did want you to know I met someone.

Whether you approve or not, is not relevant. There has been MUCH prayer put into this, a lot of counsel has been sought, and I have read and re-read the Word for answers to see if this was okay. It isn't man's or woman's approval I have sought, but God's.  THAT is what is relevant.

Each time I have asked, if this was right, God has come through with either confirmation from a person who didn't know what I was praying, or even with a dream.  I have stood in awe at God's hand in this whole thing, and those around me are excited and in awe too.

My guy friend is just that - my friend.  We have been friends for almost a year now, but that's it.  He was just a guy friend I knew from church.  I didn't entertain thoughts of being with him or even have a desire to know him other than just as some guy I knew from church.  Yet, as our friendship has grown, we have realized that God has had a special plan for us even from the beginning.

He has taken my boys under his wing and has grown to love them immensely and is excited to be spending Christmas with my family this year and me and the boys with his family.

This isn't some rushed-into relationship.  It HAS been a slow process - something I have prayed about, because I did not ever have that with D.  I also was not friends with D. when we got married.  Our friendship had to be worked on and was a constant struggle through our whole marriage.  But with my guy friend, our friendship comes easily and our relationship is easy.  CRAZY easy.

We have people around us to help us keep our feet on the ground.  My wonderful pastor and his wife help keep us accountable and have been amazing.  My sweet friend even went to my pastor to ask his permission to court me.  I was moved to tears.

My friend has been going about once a week to talk about our relationship with my pastor, and my pastor and his wife and others around us are praying for us and counseling us as we move forward. I wish I had done this with D. for I KNOW I would not have ever married him. But, then I wouldn't have my two precious children, and I would not be who I am now.

Please pray for D. He is not better, but gets worse.  I knew this would happen, as it is one of the issues of his disorder, but I also am believing that God is working on him, and that He will come back to God one day.  Oh, that that day would come sooner than later.

My heart still hurts for him and all that he has thrown away.  It has been much.  Even my sweet friend said he was so sorry for D. and all that he threw away and left.  When D. finally realizes what he has done, it will be such a sad day and time.  I hurt for him and for that day to come.

Yet, I rejoice at all that lies ahead.

Reader, I wish you could walk into my life and see all that God has done. I wish I had the time to sit and type it all, hopefully to give you a better glimpse of what God has been doing in me this last year.  But, I can not.  I can only try to catch you up as we go along in the days ahead.

Hopefully, I'll catch you up before I get married again. But, who knows.  I will try to keep posting before I write "I'm married again." But, then again, who knows. :)

Christmas Again - Looking to What Lies Ahead

Well, it's Christmas again.  As I sit in my now quiet living room looking at my tree the boys and I have put up this evening, I am sipping on my French cream decaf coffee nostalgically thinking that this is most likely and even hopefully my last Christmas here in this home.  For 7 years, I have celebrated Christmas in this house.  I have decorated the tree, added lights around my kitchen entryway, hung the wreath on the door and the wall over the sofa, decorated the bathroom, and lit holiday spice candles to make the house smell good.  A lot of good memories rest between these walls.  A LOT of good memories.

So, tonight, I'm a little sad of all that has happened here, yet I am happy at the same time looking forward to what lies ahead. I look forward to my next year of tree decorating in a new house.  I look forward to time spent around the trees opening up gifts with the family under a new roof, making new memories, and sipping on hot apple cider and cocoa between new walls.

So, instead of being sad about what will be left behind, I am going to choose to be happy for what lies ahead. There are great adventures still left to be had. There are more Christmas carols to sing off key, more tickles to be had under a new roof, and more prayers to pray in a new kitchen each morning as I start the day. There is more.  God is good, and His mercies are new EVERY morning. Lamentations 3:23